Men of Fire and Courage

Get the steak knife ready, this will be one juicy steak to chew on and savor. I'm obliged to introduce several guest bloggers who will take over Transformed during the next month or so. They will be sharing their thoughts and testimonies of what it means to be a man and the qualities that make a man. Most like me hadn't thought about it to much. The purpose is to expose what is lacking and to shake up, and manifest the very essence of "Warm Blooded Manliness", charting the course for a more productive and successful life. Now, allow me to frame the beast...

"Our task is to create a new vision of manliness in a culture that no longer believes in saints, divinely revealed ideals, or absolute values." Sam Keen

It's true. The world around us and the very culture of America is fading away. The covers are being pulled over the eyes of every man that had the dream inside of living and impacting the world for the greater good. We can take that statement and laugh it away, but the truth is, we grew up with dreams, hopes, and aspirations. Chances are most of that has dwindled down to a flickering afterthought. The question I ask today is why? Most of us are in our 30's now, or will be entering our prime very soon. We aren't just kids with jobs anymore. We are starting to become the leaders of our families, workplaces, and in society as a whole. Whatever it is you do and wherever it is you go, people are watching. My concern is that men today do not have what it takes to lead our generation. Why?

One word-Passivity. Which literally means: a disposition to remain inactive or inert, the trait of lacking enthusiasm for or interest in things generally, and of course; inactivity resulting from lethargy and lack of vigor or energy. That's hard to swallow. Perhaps you're thinking "Pffft, that's not me. I'm full of vitality and testicular fortitude. I provide for my family, work hard, workout, and I'm quite successful." I would respond by asking the questions, "How's your marriage, your children, and your dream? Do you feel strong, courageous, and secure? Is life engaging, satisfying, and captivating? When was the last time you had to stick your neck out and stand up for something you believed in, or stood up for something that was wrong?" 

As men, life is hard. It's hard enough just to maintain the status quo, but what exactly is the status quo? What are we doing? My humble opinion is that we have agreed to accept life as life is dealt to us. When things don't work out for us, well, we just roll with the punches hoping and waiting for things to change. In the meantime, our strength runs on empty, our vision to perceive something better is darkened, and maintaining the status quo seems much more fruitful and productive. Listen, I have personally witnessed the destruction caused by passivity. It's disastrous. Passive men willingly choose not to intervene in a given situation for fear of criticism or just because their plain cowards. This gentlemen, is how and why our marriages, children, and dreams fade away. I've seen it in churches and in the workplace. This is especially dangerous when leadership becomes passive. The folk’s people look up to for relief, actually end up inflicting more pain and burden. Here's the good news, we can turn this around. As men, created as men, we have something built into us called "Thumos." 

"Thumos"...is a Greek word expressing the concept of "spiritedness" (as in "spirited stallion" or "spirited debate"). The word indicates a physical association with breath or blood. The word is also used to express the human desire for recognition. Thumos is man's lifeblood, the very essence of who we are. Thumos is the competitive spirit, the strong man inside, courage, and power. Thumos is what burned inside the 300 Spartans as they held off at least 200,000 Persian invaders for three days between the Trachinian Cliffs and the Malian Gulf. Thumos is what burns inside a man in the middle of the Octagon. It's something we all have and know we have. The issue is tapping into that source which has been long suppressed, and using it for the greater good.

What do I mean by that? Here's a true story. A 91 year old man was pummeled to the ground by a 5'9 male in an Atlanta Georgia suburb while15 people watched idly. The attacker was attempting to steal the man's car and wallet. The 91 year old man was beaten into a coma, and could have died, if it wasn't for some young pizza delivery driver who witnessed the attack from a block away and called Police. Allow me to say 15 people watched idly. What would you have done? Coward or hero? See, most of us men think, "Well, I'm busy and tired somebody else can help." The problem with that is everyone thinks like that! This is a mild example. This is what happens when we've lived the passive lifestyle for to long. 

Courage is the ability to confront fear, pain, danger, uncertainty, and intimidation, and always requires sacrifice. Courage is what we need today. I don't say that in terms of "superhero courage", I say this in terms of everyday type courage. I see passive men in panoramic view constantly. We've become yes men, door mats, and status quo nobleman. The focal point of this blog is to stir up the thumos! It's to start practicing courage in everyday affairs. We have to start somewhere. I believe this affects every area of our lives. If man's Thumos isn't stoked everybody suffers. As men, we can't love our wives passionately. We can't stand up and discipline our children correctly, nor do they respect us. The scary part is that most of the people I know are passive, including me. I have been working on this though. You see, we spend all our time playing defense, trying to please everyone all the time, all the while wondering why our situation and life isn't changing. It will kill us. Little by little we must start standing up and activating the courageous spirit within. In the last blog post of this series I will present several ways to stir up and maintain the thumos. Guys, we have to be guys, not pampered well mannered chick dudes. Thumos must be stoked and stirred. It's time we start cultivating...

"No man is strong unless he bears within his character antitheses strongly marked." -MLK

Finally, stay posted as we dig into this topic! Special guest blogger next week...

Maturing Through Hardships

Tammy and I just finished reading the Bait of Satan, by John Bevere. This is a book we will keep in our treasure chest. The timing of it was perfect and ordained by the Lord. I'd like to share a passage out it today...

"We grow in the tough times, not the easy times. Hard places will always come in journey with the Lord. We cannot escape them but need to face them, for they are part of the process of becoming perfect in Him. If you choose to run from them, you will seriously hinder your growth. As we overcome different obstacles, you will become stronger and more compassionate. Jesus learned obedience through suffering, as did Peter and Paul. If you are rowing on a river against the current, you will have to continuously row in order to progress against the flow of the river. If you stop rowing and relax, you will eventually flow with the current. Remember, that when we lose our life for the sake of Jesus, we will find His life. Learn to fix your focus on the end result, not the struggle."

The word here could speak many different things to you, but I'd like to highlight two key statements. "Hard places will always come in our journey, and learning obedience through suffering." Last week I mentioned there being no "one-time fix all” deliverance. We will always experience trials and struggles as long as we walk this earth. Of the knowledge of Himself that He chooses to reveal to us, you can be sure you will get an opportunity to apply it. We grow by learning how not to handle certain things, and we are stregthened when we overcome an obstacle by applying His guidance. Take a look at this scripture...For he will be like a refiner’s fire or a launderer’s soap. He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver; he will purify the Levites and refine them like gold and silver." (Malachi 3)  This is a prophecy about Jesus, and this is exactly what His Spirit does inside of us. When silver or gold are refined, they are heated. The heat makes the metal soft and pliable, and the impurities are surfaced so they can be removed.

Tough times, trials, and tribulations will come. They usually come in the form of other people, and from the spiritual battle that takes place personally as we grow closer to the Lord. Peter said, "Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you; but rejoice..." The most important thing I have learned over the last month or so, is to look at myself first when I'm encountering friction. Could the problem be with me? Could I be wrong? Am I being selfish? Oftentimes, I tend to blame others and pray for circumstances or people to change, when I'm the one that needs to change, hello. Trials are for our benefit. This is why Peter was able to say, “Rejoice." If we can begin to look at trying situations through the lens of God's Spirit, working inside of us for our good, our entire perspective will change and the blessings of God will flow into our lives.

I tend to learn things by experience, and I believe this is the path the Lord has chosen for us unfortunately. The reason? Pride and ego. I may not always be right, but I'm never wrong. Unknowingly, we believe that and unknowingly pride builds up inside of us, and pride opens the door for a sifting! Realizing this truth is hard in itself, but once we accept it the process of restoration begins. This is learning obedience through suffering. I believe the length of our suffering depends on our willingness to humble ourselves and when we choose to do so. His eye is always guiding us and He always has our best interest in mind. It's tough to see it at the time, and hopefully next time I go through a trying situation I will know what to do. Look up, look inside, listen, and wait. I realize there are trials and tough times outside of our control, but God is always in control.

Listen, nobody is perfect. There was only one perfect man who walked this earth, and He is the Lord of Heaven and Earth. God says, "My grace is sufficient for you." If we will walk humbly, endure the refining process, and accept His grace, we can become the spiritual house He intends to build. On the other hand, if we run from tough times and refuse to humble ourselves, we will remain in spiritual diapers and our love for Him will grow cold. When we were saved we didn't convince God to join our cause and fight for us the way we think He should. Instead, we joined His cause and surrendered to His awesome plan and purpose. There is no greater satisfaction or higher calling than worshipping and serving the Awesome God of this universe! How can we not stand in awe of Him as we look at creation? If I was turned away from Heaven's gates today, I would still apply the principles and guidance found in His Word. All other paths lead to frustration, destruction, aimless wondering, and depression. I learned from experience. "All the paths of the LORD are mercy and truth to such as keep his covenant and his testimonies." Psalm 25:10

“The site of storm clouds in your life is an indication of His love for you, His desire to see you steered back in the direction of His will. Because, let's face it, His will is always our best place to be – not free of challenge, necessarily, but free of those discouraging nights and weekends when we feel like we've wasted our lives on nothing. Being true to His purpose sets us up for a life of lasting meaning.”

Walking Humbly

Humility is an interesting concept. I've heard that most people who believe they are humble in fact are not. It is accepted, understood and applied as part of the Christian way of life. I want to say, if you consider yourself humble and are proud of your humility, you have been deceived and your ego is actually flexing its muscles. We tend to believe that not accepting praise, serving the poor, and choosing to passively let anything go by that will draw attention to ourselves makes us humble. You see, when we do these things we are actually taking notes in our heart of what we did, and we begin to admire and hide behind a false sense of humility. Worse, we are admiring ourselves and keeping a notebook so we can show God the wonderful things we have done. With total humility of course. 

Humility and being humbled is actually ego destroying to the greatest possible effect. How many people want their pride and sense of self worth shattered? Raise your hand. How many people in a position of respectability and authority would like their greatest secrets exposed? Raise your hand. This is close to what I'd like to discuss. It's the place where we have been exposed and humiliated and the truth comes out. It's the place where we realize our problems and conflicts that we blame others for, is in fact our own character flaws. It's the place where there is nowhere to hide, and all has been laid bare and brought to light. Most importantly though, it's the place where we acknowledge our weaknesses, accept God's grace, and where real growth begins.

Sound like fun? I share this today because I recently was humbled myself. Truly a liberating experience. I say that sarcastically because it's not fun. However, the fruit produced when grace is accepted is liberating! I imagine some of you are thinking, "O my, wonder what he did." That's ok, I think such things from time to time too when people share their experiences. Don't tell anybody I said that. The truth is, I was slow walked down the path of self righteousness, AGAIN. Not in a way that says, I do this you don't do that, I'm better than you. Rather in a more subtle way. I read the Word a lot, pray quite often, and try to live a life of obedience. I know I'm not immune to trials and tribulations... Here's where things get shaky. Because I do all these things, I should be able to blast through anything that comes my way. Surely, when I increase these "Godly" activities my problems should fade. When strife has entered my "sphere" of influence, surely the problem isn't with me. Right? I've got the formula! Pray, read, worship, don't sin, etc. 

If you've even been in this corner, then you know the frustration that follows. That frustration then turns into frustration with our Maker. It's His fault! We may not realize we are placing the blame on Him, but we are. "God, I just don't understand, I've done this, worked in this ministry, I've been obedient, etc. What else can I do?" No matter what we do or what the formula is somebody recommends, it's not going to work until we deal with ourselves. I am discovering that in order to get closer to God we have to deal with trials, character flaws, and egos. Most know this, but the process never ends. It doesn't matter how much head knowledge we have. We seek Him with our hearts, not our heads. There isn't a onetime fix all deliverance. No matter how much we read, pray, and serve, we are not immune to being humbled. There is always something inside of us that needs to change. ALWAYS. Sometimes we don't see it at first. It's usually after all the wrestling with God and endless frustration, that we see what it is that needs to change. Humility my friend is accepting grace from Him after all that! Talk about swallowing your pride. This is what grace is for.

I love how God comforts us in our afflictions. He led me to the story of Peter's life. Peter was more zealous for the things of God than any of the other disciples. He walked on the water. He had the revelation of the Lord being the Christ, the Son of God. Jesus said to Him, "Blessed are you Simon Bar-Jonah for flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but My Father who is in heaven." (Matt.16:16) Jesus changed his name from Simon to Peter. Peter also shared in the Mount of Transfiguration, with Jesus, Moses, and Elijah. I'm sure Peter was pretty confident in himself. All of these past experiences built up his pride, he could handle anything. "Lord, I am ready to go with you both to prison and to death." We know what happened. Peter did the unthinkable, he denied the Lord he thought he knew so well. All the revelations and treatment He got from Jesus didn't matter. His pride was shattered! Pride and self will is never enough to equip us for our destiny in Christ. Pride opens the door for a sifting. 

Can you imagine how Peter felt? Yet this was necessary for him to experience. God causes all things to work together for our good, even trials and affliction. The angel at the tomb gave Mary the message to tell the disciples and Peter that Jesus was going ahead of them to Galilee. Peter no longer relied on his own strength and confidence, but on the grace of God. He proclaimed the Gospel with great boldness! He became the man God created him to be, but it took being humbled to get him there. Reaching the point of having to accept God's grace isn't a wonderful spot to be in, but it brings forth the revelation of our total dependence on Him and the greatness of our God! There is no set formula for living the life of faith. It should be a joy and not a burden. We will experience trails and afflictions, but when we do we should look inside ourselves first instead of wrestling with God. God never changes.

"He has showed you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?" Micah 6:8