Humility is an interesting concept. I've heard that most people who believe they are humble in fact are not. It is accepted, understood and applied as part of the Christian way of life. I want to say, if you consider yourself humble and are proud of your humility, you have been deceived and your ego is actually flexing its muscles. We tend to believe that not accepting praise, serving the poor, and choosing to passively let anything go by that will draw attention to ourselves makes us humble. You see, when we do these things we are actually taking notes in our heart of what we did, and we begin to admire and hide behind a false sense of humility. Worse, we are admiring ourselves and keeping a notebook so we can show God the wonderful things we have done. With total humility of course.
Humility and being humbled is actually ego destroying to the greatest possible effect. How many people want their pride and sense of self worth shattered? Raise your hand. How many people in a position of respectability and authority would like their greatest secrets exposed? Raise your hand. This is close to what I'd like to discuss. It's the place where we have been exposed and humiliated and the truth comes out. It's the place where we realize our problems and conflicts that we blame others for, is in fact our own character flaws. It's the place where there is nowhere to hide, and all has been laid bare and brought to light. Most importantly though, it's the place where we acknowledge our weaknesses, accept God's grace, and where real growth begins.
Sound like fun? I share this today because I recently was humbled myself. Truly a liberating experience. I say that sarcastically because it's not fun. However, the fruit produced when grace is accepted is liberating! I imagine some of you are thinking, "O my, wonder what he did." That's ok, I think such things from time to time too when people share their experiences. Don't tell anybody I said that. The truth is, I was slow walked down the path of self righteousness, AGAIN. Not in a way that says, I do this you don't do that, I'm better than you. Rather in a more subtle way. I read the Word a lot, pray quite often, and try to live a life of obedience. I know I'm not immune to trials and tribulations... Here's where things get shaky. Because I do all these things, I should be able to blast through anything that comes my way. Surely, when I increase these "Godly" activities my problems should fade. When strife has entered my "sphere" of influence, surely the problem isn't with me. Right? I've got the formula! Pray, read, worship, don't sin, etc.
If you've even been in this corner, then you know the frustration that follows. That frustration then turns into frustration with our Maker. It's His fault! We may not realize we are placing the blame on Him, but we are. "God, I just don't understand, I've done this, worked in this ministry, I've been obedient, etc. What else can I do?" No matter what we do or what the formula is somebody recommends, it's not going to work until we deal with ourselves. I am discovering that in order to get closer to God we have to deal with trials, character flaws, and egos. Most know this, but the process never ends. It doesn't matter how much head knowledge we have. We seek Him with our hearts, not our heads. There isn't a onetime fix all deliverance. No matter how much we read, pray, and serve, we are not immune to being humbled. There is always something inside of us that needs to change. ALWAYS. Sometimes we don't see it at first. It's usually after all the wrestling with God and endless frustration, that we see what it is that needs to change. Humility my friend is accepting grace from Him after all that! Talk about swallowing your pride. This is what grace is for.
I love how God comforts us in our afflictions. He led me to the story of Peter's life. Peter was more zealous for the things of God than any of the other disciples. He walked on the water. He had the revelation of the Lord being the Christ, the Son of God. Jesus said to Him, "Blessed are you Simon Bar-Jonah for flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but My Father who is in heaven." (Matt.16:16) Jesus changed his name from Simon to Peter. Peter also shared in the Mount of Transfiguration, with Jesus, Moses, and Elijah. I'm sure Peter was pretty confident in himself. All of these past experiences built up his pride, he could handle anything. "Lord, I am ready to go with you both to prison and to death." We know what happened. Peter did the unthinkable, he denied the Lord he thought he knew so well. All the revelations and treatment He got from Jesus didn't matter. His pride was shattered! Pride and self will is never enough to equip us for our destiny in Christ. Pride opens the door for a sifting.
Can you imagine how Peter felt? Yet this was necessary for him to experience. God causes all things to work together for our good, even trials and affliction. The angel at the tomb gave Mary the message to tell the disciples and Peter that Jesus was going ahead of them to Galilee. Peter no longer relied on his own strength and confidence, but on the grace of God. He proclaimed the Gospel with great boldness! He became the man God created him to be, but it took being humbled to get him there. Reaching the point of having to accept God's grace isn't a wonderful spot to be in, but it brings forth the revelation of our total dependence on Him and the greatness of our God! There is no set formula for living the life of faith. It should be a joy and not a burden. We will experience trails and afflictions, but when we do we should look inside ourselves first instead of wrestling with God. God never changes.
"He has showed you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?" Micah 6:8
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