Reflections 2013: Life is Hard, REALLY

I usually end the year with a post reflecting on the challenges and lessons learned  this year and what my ambitions and disciplines will be for the coming year to make it much more fruitful. As I was thinking about this past year, I made an observation. Every year I think to myself something like this: "Next year is going to be different. Life is going to be smooth sailing. The bank account is going to show a few more commas, the family will get along perfectly, I'll finally get promoted, the Redskins will win the SuperBowl, happy happy happy." I think, "If I can just get these few principles I've learned down pat I can live the next year in peace without any hindrances." But for some reason this just hasn't happened.

Ian Smith has said, " Luck is great, but most of life is hard work.

Lesson learned:

Life is hard, REALLY. In fact, it's hard almost every single day. Aside from working everyday and caring for our families we need to stay healthy, build our skillset, and grow in our relationship with the Lord. Naturally, it takes time and hard work to cultivate anything worth while whether it's a relationship, ministry, or a profession. Meanwhile, there are problems and opportunities bundled in packages simply waiting for us to discover on a daily basis. REALLY. We should learn to expect problems and friction and not be shocked when they arise. I share this because I personally have believed the lie, I know some of  you have as well, that there will come a time when things get much easier. We think, "If I can trust the Lord through this season,  the future will be much easier to navigate." Following the Lord doesn't mean life gets easier, it means we can overcome in every situation and circumstance.

Allow me to share a snippet from John Maxwell:

"Everyone's reality is different. However, there are some realities that are true for all of life:  

Life is difficult. Life is difficult for everyone. Life is more difficult for some than others. Somehow people believe that life is supposed to be easy. This is particularly a problem here in America. We expect a smooth easy road to success. We expect our lives to be hassle free. That is not reality! Even if we are willing to concede that life is difficult for most people, deep down inside many of us secretly hope somehow this truth won't apply to us. I'm sorry to say it isn't so. No one escapes life's problems, failures, and loses. If we are to make progress we must do so through life's difficulties. If we don't understand and accept this truth that life is difficult, we set ourselves up for failure."

It's hard to swallow, but it's true. How many folks believe life is only hard for them? Don't raise your hand. My life has been a twisted mess of hurt, letdowns, and hardships but I've also experienced some great things and have made lasting memories. As I've matured, I've noticed a pattern. Life is full of ups and downs (REALLY) and most of the time everyday is a struggle. The application here is to accept the fact that that life is difficult. BUT, when the good times come, celebrate them. Learn to recognize the waves of peace, pause and enjoy them. Not long after your going to be grinding it out until you get over the next hump. "There's a time and a season for every activity under the heavens. A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance..." #Truth

The other lesson I learned is that it's ok to be me. I like and enjoy certain things because it's a part of me, it's how I'm wired. What a tragedy it is to copy the lifestyle, talents, and personality of others. If we aren't careful we won't fulfill our dream because we're to focused on imitating the dreams of others. The comparison game is never ending and exhausting. This came to a head for me while I was at an event earlier this year. I believe I compared myself to every single person I saw, for hours. Worse yet, I think I wanted to be like every single person, weird huh?

My grandfather taught me there's always someone better no matter how good you are. Let them do them and you do you. Or, "You, get you you and I'ma get, me me", as a friend of mine says. Except who you are, don't be ashamed of it. Grow in the areas you need to grown in but never compromise your personality, desires, and talents. If you've been living someone else's dream, ask God for a dream of your own and He will give it to you.

"Whatever you think, be sure it is what you think; whatever you want; be sure it is what you want". -TS Elliot


Life takes hard work, patience, and determination (REALLY) to make it through. I believe it was Augustine who said, "The more I have to do today, the more time I spend with God." Likewise,  Dr. Hang Yang's sermon this year was a powerful reminder as to how it's done, by fixing our eyes on Jesus. "Fix" literally means to direct one's eyes, attention, or mind steadily or unwaveringly toward. When we fall we dust ourselves off and get back up. We fight our battles on our knees. Keep moving forward, laugh at yourself, and know this, "It takes a long long time for God to work in someone's life before it amounts to anything."(Rick Warren)

My power verse for next year is Colossians 2:7:

"So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, so walk in  Him, rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness."

Trust through Change

"Perpetual change is not something unsettling, but an unfolding pattern, scintillating and God given. Instead of frozen perfection, there is a kaleidoscopic movement of innumerable processes, each with its own character and period of blossoming and ripening, beautiful in its time and contributing to the overall masterpiece which is the work of one creator." -Iain Provan

We all deal with change, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. The ending of one year and beginning of the next is traditionally the time when we contemplate the possibility of change. But what happens when change is forced on us, say through the loss of a relationship, a job change, or a family issue? This week I write to  offer some encouragement for those of us who are going through a season of change.

Coping with a change that you didn't initiate requires that you change your perception of the event. That being said, if we aren't careful we can easily get distorted and lose our sense of direction. It's even possible to begin to resent God and while we second guess Him, the devil seethes as he assaults our minds with all kinds of negative propaganda. (And that's where we put him in his place) I don't casually say this, but sometimes we have to "Let Go...and Let God.". While I admit that its extremely hard to do so when life is making changes that don't seem to fit, we must. While I don't know what the future holds for you or I, I do know the One who does.

Perhaps you have been  waiting for the windows of heaven to open up and for God to bless your socks off for all that faith you have? I say that with a bit of sarcasm, but there is a sense of entitlement we think we deserve because we serve God. I'm not speaking of claiming promises, I'm saying, "I know what's best for me and this isn't it", in other words. Oh how vastly different our needs are compared to what God knows is best for us at the time. I have heard many pastors and people of influence say God took them through the desert. They never imagined the journey would be as it was, but hindsight is 20/20.

While the world waits for us to fall, the scriptures say He will guide us with His eye and that the eye of the Lord is on those who fear Him. It's ok to embrace our imperfections, it's ok to admit our failures, it's ok to be uncertain of our future. This is why we have a mighty God we put our trust in. And if we know He always has our best interest in mind, and all things work for our good, then we have to trust Him. CS Lewis put it this way, "Withhold nothing from God and trust Him with everything."

God is never surprised by something that happens to us, He has already met every need you and I will ever have. Thankfully, we’re not at the mercy of the unknown; God’s Word tells us each pilgrim appears before Him (Ps. 84:7). We will be victorious, no matter how long and jagged our valleys might be, because our needs have already been provided for by the master Logistician.

 "The Lord looks from heaven; He sees all the sons of men.

 From the place of His dwelling He looks on

 all the inhabitants of the earth; 

He fashions their hearts individually;

 He considers all their works."

TRANSFORMED

" For God is not unjust  
as to forget your work and the 
love which you have shown toward His name..."

Stay the Course

More often than not I find myself thinking about the future. When will I find my purpose and what will it be? What does the Lord have planned for me? Is this what I'm going to be doing the rest of my life? I'd like to offer some encouragement today, for all of us who have hopes of seeing the Lord's plans come to full fruition in our lives. In saying that, most of us have discovered that walking with the Lord is a journey and that He is in no hurry to have us take over the world. If you didn't know that, welcome to the club.

God has birthed passions and desires in our hearts, but in order to turn our dreams into reality we have to walk the path set before us and be willing to stay the course no matter what. We can choose to let God work and to establish us as His chosen vessel, or we can resist, losing His best for us. God is not interested in using only what we think is beneficial to Him, He is interested in using us in the way He designed and destined us to be used. It will take time, patience, and perserverance. Below is an illustration of our journey taken from the "Ultimate Conversation", be encouraged.

When I was just a lad, my mother taught me this principle through a wonderful lesson about gardening. I can still remember how we went out to the backyard and she prepared a small, three-foot-square area so we could sow some seeds. Even though I had no idea what we were growing, I was eager to see what would happen. We dug the holes, planted those seeds in the ground, and covered them up again. Then Mother explained that it wouldn't be long before we noticed tiny green sprouts coming up, which would confirm that something was developing below the soil. Not long after that, we would have fruit. So day after day, I would walk out to the backyard and look for evidence of growth. Seeing none, I began to get so frustrated that I decided to find out what was happening with those seeds.

So, I dug them up. I did not realize that it was going to take a while for the plants to mature and produce fruit. And because of my haste to see results, I destroyed those seeds right as they were developing. How much fruit did I grow? None. That experience taught me a lesson about being patient and waiting for God's timing. The Lord has a schedule for how He will answer our prayers and help each of us progress spiritually, conforming us to the image of Christ. However, we should not allow ourselves to become impatient or try to take control because there are destructive consequences to our actions. Our responsibility is simply, to rest in the eager anticipation of His provision for us and to trust: "The Lord will accomplish that which concerns me." (Psalm 138:8)

 -Charles Stanley, The Ultimate Conversation 2012

Jesus never promised that every door would open immediately. On the contrary my brothers, in telling us to "seek" and "knock," Jesus used a Greek verb which is best translated as "knock, and keep on knocking" and "seek, and keep on seeking." Some of the gifts the Lord has for us will only come after long seasons of waiting and praying. God knows what is best for us, and He always has our best interest in mind. When we think we aren't getting what we want, there is a reason behind it. The Lord sees more deeply than we do. We need to trust Him to answer our prayers in His timing and to transform our dreams so they conform to His will. We must realize that while we are patiently expecting the Lord's answer, He is actively engaged on our behalf: arranging circumstances, purifying our motives, teaching us to rely on Him, and preparing us to influence others.

We can't change the past. Whatever has happened in our lives so far, both good and bad, cannot be altered and all the decisions and events that have made us what we are today are inscribed in the story of our life. With the LORD's help we can change the future. You and I aren't here by chance or by accident; God put us here on this journey called life. We came from Him, and our greatest joy will come from giving ourselves back to Him and learning to walk with Him everyday. Through the twists, turns, briars, and lush pastures, we will find our way if we keep our eyes on Him. Lord help us to stay on the potters wheel, through the frustration, pain, sin, and hurt, until we become the vessel you had in mind all along. Stay the course, and may God bless you and your family, and may all your plans succeed in 2013.

For my wife, I love you. (2010)

O Lord, our Lord, how excellent is Your name in all the earth, who have set Your glory above the heavens! Out of the mouth of babes and nursing infants you have ordained strength, because of Your enemies, that You may silence the enemy and the avenger. When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers, The moon and the stars, which You have ordained, what is man that You are mindful of him, and the son of man that You visit him? For You have made him a little lower than the angels, and You have crowned him with glory and honor. You have made him to have dominion over the works of Your hands; You have put all things under his feet, all sheep and oxen—even the beasts of the field, the birds of the air, and the fish of the sea that pass through the paths of the seas. O Lord, our Lord, how excellent is Your name in all the earth! (Psalm 8)

Commit your way to the LORD, trust also in Him, and He will do it. (Proverbs 16:3)